A first. That’s what I got for my degree.
It‘s weird, how important grades are, until you get them. Until they become a redundant piece of paper on your wall or in your display cabinet.
But, no matter what grade or level I reach, it is never enough.
Studying an unorthodox subject leaves you at the forefront of family discussions. Well, at least the discussions on my father’s side of the family. And even though, most of them are almost half way around the world; I do wonder if my path was fuelled by their wagging tongues and judgmental tones.
Before I started my art foundation, my uncle spoke to my mother on the phone. To examine the issue of my supposedly dubious education. Mum explained to him that it was my decision and that it was something I was passionate about. And in the quires stopped. I know that most of them are probably married, well-paid and are professionals with children. But they never really have the time for their children or spouses; not because of their careers, but because it’s not a ‘priority’. They don’t know the people who are supposedly the closest to them and they don’t know me.
I know that in the real world my degree doesn’t count for a lot, but I worked as hard as anyone else. I went to one of the top art/fashion universities and to get a first, I had to get above 85%, which most people don’t know. I’m definitely poor, but I am fairly content; my family seem to have come around to the idea of my career path- especially when they can boast about my grade.
But I have doubts. Like anyone else I feel the consuming feeling of uncertainty. But, I think that I finally have worked out that good things come to those who work hard. We’re in a world that doesn’t necessarily fully accept us and we have to play the game, put in the time and effort and curve it to make it fit us.
I will, or have, probably bitched and moaned about the hard times, but things aren’t meant to come easily. It helps you appreciate the things you have and hold them dear.
Let’s just hope that we’re true grafters...
I didn't know that you had to get above 85% either! Impressive J, very impressive. I totally get what you been about feeling judged because of the subject you do as well. It was part of the reason I did not pursue Art and the less "academic" subjects at school but has now led me to not really knowing what I should do with myself. "Consuming feeling of uncertainty" indeed. Boo.
ReplyDeleteDidn't think your post was rant-y at all. It was a nice continuation and alternative perspective of the other posts' University-orientated topics and I found it insightful.
I really enjoyed reading that post. Its quite inspiring and definately insightful as Im going into my second year of my fashion forecasting degree.
ReplyDeleteIts true, people have to comment on your life and what your doing. All of us Fashion/Art students are accused of being frivolous. But people like yourself who can be proud of your 1st show that it is something to take serious.
Persevere and you will get to where you deserve.
Definitely an advocate of hard work. Congrats on the 1st (sorry if my comment is redundant, did you graduate this year or last?...)
ReplyDeleteAlso, family tend to live vicariously through you, especially in this day and age, and considering our cultural backgrounds, etc. It's quite a situation then, when they judge you at the same time! But like TrendSpot said, persevere, aim where you wish, and the rest will follow.
Thanks girls! btw I graduated last year.
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